Submissive “Lovely”

I stand before the mirror and I cannot make any sense of it. All I see is a distortion of individual features. Parts that are misshapen, too big or too small. Nothing makes sense and I do not like the person staring back at me. I take a photo and see the same face and the same body from the mirror. I question why she cannot be different. I want to run but how do I run from her. She follows me everywhere. I will choose a photo to send to MJL and his response comes through, always the same, “Lovely”. And I ponder, Who is “Lovely”?

Who is MJL? You might ask. He is my friend, my protector, my Master. He tells me to go before a mirror, place my hands behind and my head and look at the sub standing there. He will ask, “How does she look?” At first glance, I see the distortion I have come to dislike but then the pieces come together and I see a submissive who stands before me and I am filled with a little more understanding and remorse. I say, “She looks submissive and beautiful.” MJL says, “She is Lovely”. And I think, Who is “Lovely”? He tells me to love her and take care of her for she belongs to him. He might say to take a photo and I do not like this one bit but my response comes out, “Yes Sir”. He will ask, “How does she look”? Again, fear grips me and I agonize over looking at it but I comply. “She looks submissive, cared for, happy and loved”. He will say, “She is Lovely”. And I once again wonder, Who is “Lovely”?

Now I see it. I can comprehend what he has been trying to tell me. The submissive in the mirror and in the photos, she is “Lovely”. But what’s more, is the astonishment and elation I feel from the realization that we are one in the same. It was always me he spoke of. I am his “Lovely”. I am from this day forward his submissive “Lovely”.

Coalescing Souls

As I go about my day, I can feel you upon my skin. It is the lightest of touches, but you are not here. It is the most intoxicatingly tantalizing of touches awakening every fiber of my being, but you are not here. The feeling of a cool breeze brushing across your skin causing goosebumps, but you are not here. Your voice vibrates through my entire body causing my heart to speed and my breathing to quicken, but you are not here. Knowing you has brought me to life and challenged all I know and I am never alone, but you are not here. You flow through me constantly igniting my very soul, but you are not here. You walk beside me guiding and protecting me, but you are not here. It is your very essence that surrounds me and it is in the knowledge of your existence that makes you ever present. The truth is, you are here because our souls will forever be intertwined. A bond that no amount of time or distance can break. Our bond will forever bend and mold to our surroundings but never will we part…

Wild

I have been told I can be impulsive and wild. Am I? Or do I simply march to the beat of a different drum? What is wild? Is it not fitting into the box everyone else does? If so, I am proud to be wild. I love to push back and seek other routes in life. Perhaps this is where my Master comes in handy? He keeps me safe but never traps me or changes me. He accepts all of me and challenges me or reins me in, when needed. I have a wondering mind and a need to be controlled and yet set free. How can this be and how does it make any sense? How can the control from my Master also bring me freedom and a sense of containment?